"I'm playing tennis tonight. "
"Oh, how funny, so am I."
"Oh...so is it like a date?"
"No, not really. Just playing tennis."
"Well, what's the difference between playing tennis and going out to dinner? You're both getting to know each other and wanting to get into each other's pants, right?"
"Not exactly."
"Yeah, whatever. I'll know when you get a boyfriend, because the phone calls will stop."
"No, because I called you yesterday."
"What are you saying? This guy is your boyfriend? You have a boyfriend now?"
"Yes, he is. Yes I do."
"Oh, well, I'll talk to you later."
What you have just read was a reenactment of a toolbox, being a douche bag :)
This gentlemen (if you want to call him that), was a really good guy. Sure things moved slower than me getting up at 4:45 AM to go running, but it was nice (sometimes). Other times it was dreadful. 2 words to sum up the frustration: Buddy Hug.
Dude LOVED giving the "buddy hug" at the end of the night. And Madge can attest to this-as after said frustrating hugs, I would call for back-up to help analyze the nights event and to catch onto anything that maybe I did that would guarantee a "buddy hug" rather than a "let's take this one step further, kiss good night".
But alas...failure after all my efforts to show this guy that I am (was) interested and enough with the buddy hugs, let's get down to it already. He actually has the audacity to tell me after above conversation that he was "courting me" for 8 months and that I was actually "cheating on him" by getting a boyfriend. Excuse e moi? Did I miss something? CHEATING? COURTING? WTF!!!???!!!
He then proceeded to tell me that he tried to kiss me on multiple occasions, but I was like "an owl with iron-clad panties on". DUMBFOUNDED. That's all I can say. WOW! There's another word I can say to describe how I was feeling. Allow me to throw this tidbit on the scene-he made it very clear that he does not do long-distance relationships (despite the fact that he's never had one) and considering him and I live 30 minutes away, this was (to him) a long-distance relationship. Fine. Boom goes the dynamite-not interested anymore, I'll take this and chalk it up to having a good guy as a friend and leave it at that. Apparently, I didn't get the memo where he was still interested!
Men, do me a favor...allow the balls to drop, use your mouth and voice what you want-just like you, women are not mind-readers. You want something, use your big boy words and just tell us. If you're interested, say you're interested. If you want a kiss, grab her face (because that is actually a turn-on) and freakin' kiss her already!!!
Stay tuned for more dysfunctional dating tactics, brought to you by the Douche Bags of America.
